Buried, But Breathing In Regret
by sockstar
Summary: Carly is suffering abuse at the hands of Griffin. Freddie and Sam both help Carly with her pain. Carly/Griffin. Trio Friendship. Warnings for Domestic and Sexual Violence.
1. Buried, But Breathing In Regret

**Buried, But Breathing In Regret**

**Rating: **T

**Notes: **Might be a one-shot. Might be more.

* * *

**Summary:** Carly is suffering abuse at the hands of Griffin. Carly wonders how far she'll go to stop it. Carly/Griffin. Maybe Creddie, maybe Seddie in future chapters.

* * *

She glanced at the .22 calibre gun before her as thoughts bombarded her mind. Thoughts of death and of him. Tears streamed down her face as she recalled the abuse. He had hit her, hurt her and left her. Yet through it all she was still in love with him. With each passing day, her longing for his touch, presence and change only seemed stronger. She stared at her wrists. They were outlined with self-inflicted scars. Each representing the severe hurt and remorse she had gone through over the years. She was a fool and she had punished herself through emotional as well as physical pain. She thought she'd keep going until she couldn't take it any more.

Until now.

She reached for the gun and stared hard at the barrel. She positioned it on her chest, index finger almost ready to pull the trigger. Out of the blue, someone was banging on the front door. She hurriedly slid the gun beneath her bed and with a mammoth effort, she rose and dragged her feet towards it.

As she approached closer, the banging grew louder and louder. She was afraid that it would wake her neighbours.

"It's me."

She stopped, panic aroused. She thought she recognised the voice.

"I'm not here to hurt you again."

The voice belonged to Griffin, her husband. Sorrow poured through her as images from her past recycled in her mind. She blinked away the tears. She wanted to believe those words.

"What do you want?" she asked.

Silence ensued.

"You," he said eventually. She could almost sense the truth and sincerity in his voice but she wasn't allowing her thoughts to control her actions.

"Why?"

"Because I love you, Carly."

She swallowed down a strangled cry of despair. She had missed those words. She almost broke down but did her best to regain composure. She was perplexed as to what to do.

"Say you love me Carly."

She gasped as her mind reeled back to the time when he'd abused her. Griffin had pinned Carly's hands down over her head as his heavy body pressed her into the mattress. She could feel his erection pressing against her skin and knew what would come next. His smell had smelled of stale cigars and whiskey. She'd felt dirty and unclean when he touched her.

She didn't want his idea of sex. She didn't want him.

But she was careful to hide her revulsion and fear. The last time she'd tried to resist him, he'd slapped her hard across the face, and after he'd raped her he'd locked her in a dark closet all night long.

Griffin had thrust inside her, using as much force as she could. Carly couldn't suppress a wince.

He'd smiled and pushed into her again and again until tears spilled down her cheeks and stained the pillow under her head. He'd enjoyed her suffering.

"You love this, don't you?" he'd whispered against her ear.

She couldn't bring herself to respond.

He'd straightened and slapped her hard against her face. "Say you love me."

She'd tasted blood. "I do."

Griffin had smiled, satisfied. He'd cupped her full breasts with his hands. "I want us to have a baby, Carly. I want a child to bind us together forever."

Fear had burned inside of her, faster and faster. He'd fisted his fingers in her long dark hair and pressed his cheek to hers. His breath was hot against her face. Sweat had dripped from his body.

"Say you love me," Griffin had commanded.

She didn't speak. Saying the words would make her ill.

"Say it!" he'd urged. He'd tightened his hold on her hair and pulled until sections started to come out. Pain had seared Carly's scalp. She'd started to weep again. "I love you."

* * *

"Say you love me, please."

He was still outside, waiting. Restlessness overwhelmed her.

* * *

**AN**: There may be more on this story in the future. Other pairings undecided.


	2. The Sadness Will Never End

**The Sadness Will Never End**

**Notes: **Thanks to reviewers Mason And Alex, Snapplelinz, Darsnider, Fanfic-Reader-88, DontxLetxGo and StoryTeller125. Thank you for reading and reviewing, it means a lot to me.

* * *

"Please, I just wanna talk to you. I miss you."

She wiped her tears with the back of her hand then took a few gradual steps back, turned and dashed towards her room. She kneeled and reached for the gun under her bed and made her way back to the front door. She carefully turned the knob and once ajar, she instantly pointed the gun at his face.

"Carly, hey, what's all this?"

He inched closer, arms wide as if in preparation to embrace her, but also to show he wasn't carrying any weapons himself.

"Don't move," she took a step back.

"Hey, Carls, I'm here for a reconciliation. And, what the fuck, pulling a gun on me? You're too nice to shoot anyone anyway. We can talk this out. We can talk about anything remember?"

"Don't please."

"Hey honey, drop the gun. I swear I won't hurt you."

"Griffin," she eyed him suspiciously, drew a few deep breaths and closed her eyes. Damn, what was I thinking? He just wanted a reunion, she thought. She soon relaxed and steadily lowered the gun. Griffin moved with lightning speed, wrapping his hands around her throat. With a violent shove, he ground her back into hard marble table. The pressure on her throat made speaking difficult. She thought about the gun she had just carried, but had skittered out of the room. "Get your hands off me," she managed.

He snarled and put his lips to her ear. "Dumb bitch. You really thought I meant what I said? WHY DID YOU RUN AWAY FROM ME CARLY?"

She grabbed his hands and tried to pry them from her neck, but his grip tightened. Black spots dotted her vision. She coughed and gasped for air. Soon she'd black out. Then she'd be at his mercy.

Without warning, Griffin released his grip and lifted his weight off of her. She staggered away from the table and fell to her knees. At the same moment, Griffin was slammed to the ground with tremendous force, left clutching his own neck.

Looming over Griffin was a policeman, Officer James, removing cuffs from his waistband. Another policeman was right behind him, gun drawn. James didn't take his gaze off Griffin as he shoved the man down on the floor to his stomach. James then wedged his knees into the Griffin's back and forced his face to the floor. Cuffs clamped on wrists with a metallic click.

Griffin regained a little of his composure and started to fight the cuffs. "Fuck you!"

James pressed his knee deeper into Griffin's back. "Don't you speak one more word." He glanced over at Carly. "Hey, are you all right?"

Her throat burned as she straightened and coughed. "Yeah, I'm fine."

The other policeman didn't lower his weapon. "Do you have him, James?"

"Yes."

Griffin struggled. "Let me go. That fucking bitch has ruined my life!"

Again, James dug his knee into Griffin's back. This time he flinched. "Don't say another word." The menace in his voice chilled Carly. But still, she'd never been happier to see anyone. "Thanks."

James shot her a glance, swiftly assessing her. "Are you sure you're all right?" His voice sounded brittle.

"I'm okay."

"Your neck looks bruised." He sounded almost concerned.

"Like I said, I'm fine."

James studied her for another few seconds and then turned his attention back to Griffin. He informed him he was under arrest for assault. His wrists strained against the restraints. "The bitch deserved it."

James jerked on the cuffs. "Shut up."

The other policeman took custody of Griffin and put him in the back of a blue-and-white patrol car. He then got in the front seat of the vehicle and after several minutes of discussion with James, the car drove off.

The reality of how close Carly had come to a bad beating or worse sank in.

James rested his hands on his hips and stared at her. He kept his voice low but she heard the tension. "In case you're wondering, one of your neighbors heard the loud banging on your door and called us. So, what happened?"

Carly blinked. "Well, he was at my door, begging for a second chance so I thought he regretted what he did and had changed," she sighed miserably, running her fingers through her dark curls. "Okay, I know, I'm dumb. I shouldn't believe him but… you know…"

James pulled a piece of gum from his coat pocket and popped it into his mouth. He crossed his arms and asked sternly. "Did you ever file charges against him?"

A sad smile lifted the corners of her mouth. "No. I was too afraid of him. But two and a half months ago, I figured I couldn't take it any longer. So while he was on a 'trip', I fled with the clothes on my back and two hundred dollars cash."

"You can't stay here anymore."

"I know a place," Carly shrugged.

"Where?"

"A friend of mine's house. Her name is Sam."

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**AN: **Thanks for your support, and your comments, please R&R


	3. Bring Him Back Home Again

**Chapter Name: **Bring Him Back Home Again

**Notes: **Thanks to reviewers sweetstarre123, Darsnider, pink-strawberry-lemonade, Snapplelinz, Fanfic-Reader-88.

* * *

Carly was slumped beside the doorway of Sam's small apartment. Sam's spare key wasn't under the mat. Probably because the type of area her apartment was in was on the 'wrong side of the tracks' and leaving a key like that around was an invitation for burglary or worse. Sam was at work when the incident happened. Carly had called her and given her some basic details. Sam had started straight back, but due to her job being out of town, would take an hour to get there.

A handful of people had seen her and walked right by. They were used to people coming and going by _that_ apartment. But since no-one had ever given them trouble, the neighbors paid no mind.

Finally at last Sam trudged up the stairs.

"Hey." Carly said quietly.

"For good?" Sam asked, as she opened the door and let Carly in. The apartment wasn't much, it had a battered brown leather couch and a small TV, a kitchen with a cooktop, a fridge and a microwave. The bedroom and bathroom were the only other features. Sam threw her bag out into the bedroom then flopped onto the couch. Carly sat down beside her.

"Yes. The cops are filing charges. I never want to see him again."

Sam breathed a sigh of relief. Years of working straight out of high school as a laborer for a demolition company had left Sam face and body hardened. A chance meeting with one of the owners had lead to her moving to the company office but her looks still hadn't regained their former glory just yet. Her soft golden curls were now a dirty blonde, cropped short after having got used to the look when she needed to avoid her hair being caught in machinery. It also kept her safe on the handful of occasions she was needed on-site.

Sam pulled Carly over in a strong hug. Carly started sniffling, then laid her head in Sam's lap. Sam switched the tv on, and started flicking through the channels.

"Hey look, a re-run of Girly Cow."

Carly smiled. They watched, alternating silence with laughter. Five minutes before the end, Carly's eyes fluttered and closed and she drifted off to sleep.

* * *

"Carly." The voice on the line was filled with crackling due to the long distance.

"Yeah?"

"I'm coming back."

"You don't have to waste your time and money just for me, I'm fine. Griffin is in jail, he didn't get bail. He can't hurt me." Freddie released the breath he'd been holding in, Griffin, he _hated_ that name, Freddie hated_ him_ with his entire being. After first hearing about the arrest he thanked God.. something he hadn't done in a long time. The second thought was to try and be there for Carly.

His first contact was with Sam. Who didn't take the idea well.

But it was too hard to stay away.

It gnawed at him. Ate away at his resistance. The announcement of the trial date snapped what little resolve he had left.

"You misunderstand. I'm not coming back for a visit. I'm coming back for good. I work from home anyway, and I can always just switch to making sites and apps for Seattle companies. I'm not letting you go through this trial without me."

Silence filled the telephone, Freddie wondered if the line got cut off, "Carly?"

"Yeah. I heard."

"So?" Freddie was anxious to hear what Carly thought of the idea.. they hadn't left each other on the greatest of terms.

"Just like that?"

"Yeah."

"I don't deserve a friend like you."

"Maybe not.. but you need me right now. I'll call again once I get back."

"Where are you gonna live?" Carly asked, Mrs. Benson had moved to another state for a better job once Freddie left for college.

"I've got a place in mind. I bought it after I sold those patent rights to Pear. Cost me pretty much the entire half mil, but it's worth it." Freddie had created a small piece of software code that he then patented. Pear company released a new cell two weeks after that happened to infringe on it. Pear could have written around it since it was only a combination of other software features that caused the infringement, or licensed it. It was easier for both sides to do an outright purchase.

"You have a place in mind? You bought a house?" Carly wondered why Freddie never told her.

"Not a house Carly. A home.. I hope so. But yeah. I bought the old apartment. Your home. I want you to come live there with me."

* * *

Carly was sitting on a brand new leather couch in what was now Freddie's apartment. Sam and Freddie helped distract Carly from the trial by getting her fully involved with the renovations. Sometimes it was going to a shop. Sometimes it was browsing online. But nothing in the world could distract her from this day's events.

"The jury aren't going to believe a word he said." Sam stated calmly.

"What if they do Sam? What if they do? What Griffin told them made me sound whore who liked being smacked around. It's not true!" Carly started sobbing and crying.

Freddie's heart broke for her, again and again it was smashed and torn and cut into ribbons by her but no matter what Carly did, or what Griffin forced her to do, he never gave up on her. The sight of Carly with tears streaming down her face, head in her hands.. it would never stop feeling so incredibly wrong. Like a dream, as if life itself was simply wrong for treating her the way it did.

Before he could reply Sam spoke instead, "It'll be okay Carly. The cops got him red-handed, they'll show the pictures you took after he beat you.. he's not going to get away with anything."

Freddie spoke, his voice almost a whisper, "Carly... I promise if they let him go, I'll make him pay for everything he did to you." He then wrapped his arms around Carly.

"Thank you," Carly replied as she leaned into Freddie's embrace.

* * *

"... we find the defendant guilty of all charges." Carly broke into a cry of relief, doubled over in the seat, her eyes filled with tears, emotions swirling, giddiness at being found guilty, disgust, hatred for Griffin and dozens of other unknowable but distinct feelings flooded her mind.

The only thing left now was sentencing.

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**AN: **I have updated the rating to an M to reflect the themes of the story. I might not have the time to reply fully to any reviews for this chapter, but I do appreciate any you might leave. This story will have maybe a half-dozen or less chapters. It won't be a long story. Thank you.


	4. Visions

**Chapter Name: **Visions

**Notes: **Thanks to reviewers **sweetstarre123**, **Darsnider**, **pink-strawberry-lemonade**, **Fanfic-Reader-88** and **Snapplelinz. ****  
**

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"I find you to be a despicable, monstrously evil human being. You took advantage of the love and affection Miss Shay held for you, twisted it for your own sick and depraved needs. You have not shown one shred of remorse for your actions. I could go on and on about the harm, the damage your actions caused but I simply want you gone from my courtroom. You are the reason why her father spent the last two years of his life estranged from his only daughter. You stole five years of Miss Shay's life that she can never get back. What I can do however, is take years away from you. I sentence you to 15 years in prison, and you shall forever be listed as a registered sex offender. Get out of my courtroom. Ladies and Gentlemen of the jury, this concludes your service..."

* * *

It was the middle of the night, a week after the trial ended. Freddie was in the master bedroom on the top floor of the apartment, beside the old studio. He was putting the finishing touches on a website for a client.

He'd stepped foot in it exactly once before he moved in, when looking for something Carly had lost. It was filled with storage boxes. After he opened the first box and found a photo album packed with old photo's of Carly and Spencer's parents, he backed out of the room in unease. Whatever was in the boxes was in storage now, or distributed to Steven's surviving relatives.

A few of the items were with Spencer in France where he'd moved to feel closer to 'real art' in his words. Freddie thought he was running away from loneliness and the knowledge he'd lost his father, mother and that he'd let his little sister push him away. It was bitterly ironic to Freddie he thought, that Spencer was doing the same thing as his father did when Mrs. Shay died. Another generation of Shay men abandoning the people they were supposed to care for.

Freddie vowed he'd never do the same to Carly. He was done with running away.

Spencer had chanced a meeting with one of the major art gallery directors, which then became a job as part of the art history department. Which let him immerse himself in work.

Like father like son.

Way back, years ago, when Spencer found out about how he went into the master bedroom, he took Freddie aside and told him in no uncertain terms that he was never to go into that room again. Carly told him not to worry about it now though. It was his house. It was his bedroom now, and would actually get some use.

Speaking of Spencer, Freddie had been keeping him up to date on all the news. Spencer was in the middle of sorting out the details of a new wing of the gallery, and couldn't be spared the time off. At least that was the excuse Spencer gave.

After sending through an email, he thought he heard crying coming up through an air vent, just barely behind the music he was listening to. Freddie turned down the music. Nothing.

The next time he heard it in between a song change, and he recognized it immediately.

Freddie despised the world for making Carly cry like she was. He sighed. Freddie stood up, left the room and silently made his way down up stairs.

Carly's bedroom door was open, a crack of light peeking through. Freddie gently knocked then opened the door. Sam was holding onto Carly, wrapped tightly in a blanket almost like a mother carrying a newborn baby.

Their eyes locked, each taking in the sight of eyes filled with unspoken grief and anger and desire to do the best for Carly that they could.

"I got this.. get some sleep Freddie."

"You sure?"

"Yeah. Go back to bed nub before you wake Carly." Sam placed Carly gently down onto the pillow and covered her back up with the blanket. She stood up from the bed and walked over, grabbing Freddie's hand and dragging him through the door so they could leave Carly to sleep.

Freddie quietly shut the door behind himself.

When Sam tried to detach her hand Freddie grabbed on and held firm.

"Sam.. you can come live here if you want. That place you live is an expensive shit-hole and it's on the other side of the city from where you work so you spend an hour fighting traffic on each trip. If you lived here you could get to work from here in 15."

"I know. I just don't want to i-"

Freddie cut her off, "I know things got fucked up with us in the last year of school... our break-up.. running away from Seattle for college without patching things up with you or Carly, but that's in the past now. For me at least. If you want it to be too, I just want to do the best for Carly. That's always involved you Sam."

"Yeah, but do you really want me here?"

"I wouldn't have asked otherwise. Pay me rent of half whatever you were paying at the other place, and a share of the other bills and try replacing all the food you eat sometimes and I'm cool. It's time to bury the hatchet Puckett. What do you say?"

Sam stepped in close to Freddie, then grabbed him by the waist in a strong hug. Freddie was pleasantly surprised.

"Thank you Freddie. We missed you. _I _missed you. I'm glad you're back. Carly is too. More than she can tell you right now." Sam said bashfully.

"No hard chiz," He said as they broke the hug.

"Yes hard chiz, you didn't have to do this. Not for me or for Carly."

"You're my friends, no matter what happened. I couldn't stand by and watch you two go through this alone." Freddie yawned, Sam followed straight after and they shared a quiet laugh.

"Well thank you anyway. For everything." Sam leaned up on her toes and planted a soft kiss on his cheek.

"Goodnight Freddie."

"Night Sam."

Freddie waited till Sam was down stairs then moved back to Carly's room. Freddie wanted to check Carly one last time before he went to bed. He opened the door slightly to see Carly still sleeping peacefully. Freddie closed the door carefully so as not to stir her, the click of the latch was the only sound in the room until the morning when Carly rose from her slumber.

* * *

"Carly.. Carly.. wake up.." Freddie was in a mild panic, having heard Carly's screams echo up into his room once more. Only this time Sam wasn't around to hear as she was visiting Melanie for the weekend.

Carly was speaking in fits and streams, gibberish word salad. Baby. No. Pain. Baby. Hurt. Sorry. Never. Griffin.

Freddie had declined so far to try to wake her physically, instead hoping to calm her down or wake her gently. Instead she started thrashing about, clearly in the middle of a nightmare. Hearing his name hardened his resolve.

"Carly.. please, it's me," Freddie held down her shoulders to prevent Carly from struggling, all the while calling her name. The restraint only served to increase Carly's panic.. her eyes finally flew open.

"Griffin don't please god don't hurt me, I'll let you if you don't hurt me, no no no, please please don't hurt me again if you love me," Carly cried out in horror, her body quaking against his hands.

"Carly it's me. Freddie. You're safe. I'm not going to hurt you." Freddie lifted his hands up from Carly's shoulders.

She immediately punched him in the face.

Freddie recoiled and groaned, his hand reached up to his nose. He didn't feel any bleeding, but it did hurt a hell of a lot. Carly leaped out of bed and ran out the door with Freddie racing after her. He turned on the light switch beside the door and flooded the entire floor with light.

"Carly stop! It's me. _Freddie!_"

Carly stopped in her tracks. She turned sharply on her heel. Her breath shuddered and caught in her throat, "Oh god Freddie."

Instead of running away she ran towards him, "I'm so sorry.. I was having a nightmare.. I hit you! Are you okay?"

"Yeah. I'll be fine. I'm worried about you though. It must have been a pretty intense nightmare." Freddie took Carly by the hand and lead her downstairs to sit on the couch. Freddie himself went into the kitchen. He made them each a mug of hot chocolate, and returned to give one to Carly.

"Do you want to talk about it?" He asked, as he sat next to Carly, who snuggled up beside him.

"No."

"Okay."

Freddie didn't broach the topic further. Carly calmed down next to him as they both drank their hot chocolate.

Carly's resolve wavered as her heart rate began to drop and she regained her composure.

"What did I say? Sam says I talk in my sleep." Carly looked up to Freddie, doe eyed and sad.

Freddie couldn't help his gaze wandering down to her arms. Her arms were covered by her night shirt, but he knew hidden underneath was a crisscross of red marks and scars, "Just random words."

Freddie saw her open her mouth slightly, like she was about to talk further. But instead she hesitated.

Instead of talking, she brought the drink up to her lips and took a sip.

"Thank you for making this, it's delicious." Carly finished up the drink, eating up the marshmallow last of all. They both put their cups down.

"You're welcome. Do you want to go back to sleep now? It's still very early."

"Yeah. I'm feeling much better."

Carly walked over to the elevator with Freddie following. He noticed Carly had pushed the button for his floor but not her own. He smiled and kissed her forehead.

Carly tucked in beside him and her soft fluttering breath filled the room. With that soothing lullaby playing next to his ears Freddie expected to get to sleep as fast as Carly did.

Instead he remained awake for another hour or so. Running through his mind was the question of how he could help Carly.

* * *

Sam, Carly and Freddie had walked to a nearby park.

The trio wandered around watching the kids play and run around. Sam had suggested it to Carly, who said it sounded like a wonderful idea. Carly then asked Freddie to come along. They had picked up some smoothies from the Groovy Smoothie.. still there just like always. A blast from the past, T-Bo still ran the place but wasn't in that day. Sam had two of course. Carly and Freddie having finished their single smoothies, made small talk about his latest client. The wind rustled the trees around them. Kids whooping and hollering ran about, centered on the play-set in the middle of the parkland. A group was playing football, another soccer.

Sam finally finished her second smoothie, a lemon ice and chucked it into a garbage can, "Man.. all these kids running around make me feel so old."

Freddie laughed as he noticed one older kid, probably 15 or 16 years old nudge his friend next to him and not so subtly point out towards Carly and Sam. They were practically drooling. It reminded him of how Gibby used to ogle anything with a pulse whenever they weren't with female company. It also reminded him of how that was pretty much a decade ago.

"I know the feeling. I feel like I'm 50, not 25." Freddie replied to Sam. They happened across an empty park bench. Freddie and Sam both looked at each other and nodded. Each took one end of the bench. Carly took the hint and sat in the middle. With Carly in between they both turned to her.

"Carls.. we didn't come out here just for smoothies." Sam told her.

"You didn't?" Carly said, an eyebrow arched in surprise.

"That's right Carly. Don't take this the wrong way.. but we're worried for you." Freddie said.

Before Carly could reply Sam continued, "We think you need help Carly. Serious help. We both agree, so does Spencer, we're going to get you that help."

Carly opened her mouth but Freddie cut her off this time.

Freddie continued, "Even if you don't think you do. This isn't an intervention. This isn't a punishment. This isn't your fault. We aren't blaming you. We both love you and you are hurting so badly right now."

"It's not that bad." Carly finally said.

"You wake up screaming every other night."

"I'm just tired. I stay up too late watching scary movies."

"Carls.. cupcake..." Sam gently held her left arm in place.

Freddie rolled up the sleeve on her long sleeved shirt, "You're cutting again. These are all fresh."

"No.. you're wrong. You're lying." Sam saw the defeat in her eyes before Carly knew it herself.

Freddie made the final statement on the issue.

"You're in pain. So much pain you're causing even more pain to distract from it. I don't know why, or how it all works, but I know this is not healthy. We're all in this together Carly. Me. You and Sam. Let us help you. You need help. Will you let us, help you?"

Sam let go of her arm, and Carly gently rolled down the sleeve again. It took a moment for Carly to reply but when she did it was one simple word.

"Yes."

* * *

**AN: **I'm planning another 2 chapters to end this story, but it will depend on how much I can fit into the next one and if it spills over into more than 2 chapters of content.

**Fanfic-Reader-88**: You are probably right.

**baronvonmilo**: You'll have to stay tuned to see.

**pink-strawberry-lemonade**: Thank you, I'm glad you liked it.


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